Sunday, December 16, 2007

Spooners Beat Hogs, Try to Cuddle Afterwards

It's a new road season for the Hogs, but unfortunately, it was a similar result on Saturday afternoon in Norman, Oklahoma, as the Spooners beat the Razorbacks 83-72.

"They were a bunch of fags," center Steven Hill explained after the game, "We're really disappointed that we lost to Oklahomo."

When told it is pronounced "Ok-la-ho-ma", Hill responded by saying:

"All I know is that Longar Longar was trying to hold my hand down there in the low post, and I don't hold hands with no one, including all the hot chicks that want me."

(Longar Longar, aka "The Sweet Man From Sudan" went for 17 points and 7 boards against the Hogs)

The Razorbacks out-rebounded the Spooners 42-35, including a game-high of 12 from Michael Washington, but only shot 41% from the field, 21% from three-point territory, and only 53% from the free-throw line.

"You won't win many games shooting that poorly," said Coach Pelphrey after the game, "I can shoot better than my team shot today... left handed... while blind-folded... on a 12 foot goal. I realize my guys are slightly homophobic and that was a factor in today's game, but we still should have won. My team is a sucky shooting team on the road right now, and that better improve or this will be the last season that I put up with Sonny, Steven, Charles, Darien, Gary, and Vincent."

"They really threw us off our game with all their trash talking about cuddling with us after the game," said point guard Stefan Welsh, who had nine points and four rebounds. "I'm only a sophomore and I ain't never heard trash talk like that before and it really messed with my head. Even their coach (Jeff Capel) was saying things like I had a nice butt and he liked the way I penetrated their zone."

The Hogs screwed up my pre-season prediction as they now have two losses falling to 8-2 on the year. Northwestern State is up next for the Hogs on the 19th at Bud Walton Arena.

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